1、 Vasista V, BSc Horti from University of Horticultural Science Bagalkot (2019)
Whether Boy or a girl both gets affected by breakup because they share their feelings emotions and dreams of future in themselves
but during initial stage of breakup ...girls are the one who are more depressed than boys ... Because girls have figured out their future in their love and they have their own world of dream in which they constructed beautiful future about their child , midmarriage days , and even about old age.....
But boys feel they were free of all the problems whwcw usually imposed by their girlfriend.....during initial days of breakup...

無論男孩還是女孩都會受到分手的影響,因為他們彼此分享自己的情感和未來夢想。
但是在分手的最初階段,女孩比男孩更沮喪。因為女孩們已經在愛情中找到了自己的未來,她們有自己的夢想世界,在這個世界里,她們為自己的孩子、婚姻中期甚至老年時期構建了美好的未來。
但是在分手的頭幾天,男孩們感覺到他們擺脫了通常由女友施加的所有麻煩。

But over days passing girl starts to forget all the things cause she has pressure from their surrounding that she should show she is strong and is not that type to sit and cry over same problem for years together...
But boys gets deppressed and even urges to get his girlfriend back....
After considering all the situations its a clear fact that Boys (not talking about the casanova one ) get affected or hurt more than girls after break up.

但隨著時間的推移,女孩開始忘記所有的事情,因為她有來自周圍的壓力,她應該表現出她自己的堅強,不是那種坐著為同一個問題而哭泣多年的類型。
但是男孩們會感到沮喪,甚至渴望找回他的女朋友。
在考慮了所有的情況之后,一個明顯的事實是,男孩(不是說浪蕩公子)在分手后比女孩更容易受到影響或收到傷害。


Boys are more engrossed than girls: Believe me I have seen it in many relationship that after a considerate time boys are much more engrossed in a serious relationship rather than girls. After being physical in a relationship boys become more loyal & start seeing future with them. On the other side now a days girls (not all of them but most of them) dont want to think that much things, they live their life in current.
All of the above reasons are based on the modern and developing society being made in our new India. There may be few exceptions but i have noticed these things in most of the cases in my surroundings.
But one thing please never loose the one you love .... Have patience hold the nerves and stick on to your love.... Love to live

男孩比女孩更專注:相信我,我在很多戀愛關系中都看到過,經過一段深思熟慮的時間后,男孩比女孩更專注于認真的戀愛關系。在建立感情關系后,男孩們變得更加忠誠,并開始展望他們的未來。另一方面,如今的女孩們(不是所有的,但大多數)不想思考那么多事情,她們活在當下。
以上原因都是基于我們印度正在形成一個現代化和發展中的新社會??赡艽嬖谏僭S例外,但大多數情況下,我已經注意到這些事情發生在我的身邊。
但有一件事請就是永遠不要失去你所愛的人。要有耐心,保持勇氣,堅持你所愛的,并熱愛生活。



2、Saurav Singh Rathore, If My Ideas Don't Work, Sue Me. 如果我的想法不起作用,請起訴我。



He was smart looking and moreover a boy. It was just 2 months when he got a new girlfriend. He said he loved her and she's better than Anamika (Her ex). He always use to tell me that how his break-up was supposed to be for the best and how he's so happy with Kanika (present gf). In the next 3 months he completely moved on off Anamika and now he only talks about Kanika.
On the other hand, Anamika, my other close friend, she has been completely a different person now. Since they broke up, she rarely talked about him with me, she was devastated. Whenever I used to pinch her to tell me about it, she always hesitated. But when she exploded one day, believe me, sky cried that day. She told me all and how she still loves him. She never ever told anyone else in the world about how she felt after that experience.

他是個帥氣的男生。才過了兩個月他就有了新女朋友。他說他愛她,她比安娜米卡(她的前任)要好。他總是告訴我,他的分手應該是最好的選擇,他和卡尼卡(現在的女朋友)在一起很開心。在接下來的3個月里,他完全擺脫了安娜米卡的影響,現在他只談論卡尼卡。
另一方面,我的另一個親密朋友安娜米卡,她現在已經完全不同了。自從他們分手后,她很傷心,卻很少和我談論他。每當我讓她告訴我這件事時,她總是猶豫不定。但有一天她爆發了,相信我,天空都哭了。她告訴了我一切,她仍然愛著他。她從來沒有告訴世界上任何人她在那次經歷后的感受。

She remained silent and never let anyone even think that she's upset or sad. She kept it all inside her heart, in a corner somewhere. She posed strong in front of the world and never ever let herself feel bad about it in front of her best friends too.
So, for the world, she was a girl for whom that break up didn't mean much. She was that ignorant types, strong, self reliant, she was ideal types. But with me, she was her, real her. I never again asked her what's wrong, I just sat with her, I always knew the reason.

她保持沉默,從不讓任何人覺得她很難過。她把這一切都藏在心里,藏在某個角落里。她在全世界面前擺出堅強的姿態,從不讓自己在最好的朋友面前為此感到難過。
所以,對全世界來說,她是一個分手對她來說意義不大的女孩。她是自我忽略的那種人,堅強,自立,她是有自己想法的那種人。但對我來說,她就是她,真實的她。我不再問她怎么了,我只是坐在她身邊,我一直都知道原因。


It’s quite a good question, but allow me to explain with a simple analogy.
I was using “Fevikwik”, a glue, which is quite powerful. A few drops fell on my fingers, and within few seconds of contact with air it became hard.
Now, I had two choices :-
1. Leave it as it is.
2. Remove that glue from my finger.

這是一個很好的問題,但請允許我用一個簡單的類比來解釋。
我曾用過“Fevikwik”,一種強力的膠水。幾滴滴落在我的手指上,接觸空氣幾秒鐘就會變得很牢固。
現在,我有兩個選擇:-
1.保持原樣。
2.把我手指上的膠水去掉。

Since it wasn’t harming me in anyway, I could have left it as it is. But any unwanted thing that sticks to you will keep bothering you. So I decided to remove it.
The glue was so strong, that while removing it, it also removed the first layer of my skin.
So here is the answer. The person who is not strong enough to let go, suffers more. Breakup, and its suffering, is not gender specific.
The relationship is dead like that glue.
· If you want to live with that, there is no harm. But also most of your attention will be taken by it. Once it is removed, it might take extra attention, but after sometime it won’t matter anymore.

既然這對我沒什么壞處,我可以讓它保持原樣。但是任何粘在您身上的多余的東西都會一直困擾著你。所以我決定把它去掉。
膠水太強了,以至于在去除它的同時,也去掉了我的第一層皮膚。
所以答案就在這里。不能足夠堅強去放手的人,會遭受更多的痛苦。分手及其痛苦,并不是針對性別的。
關系就像膠水一樣死掉了。
·如果你愿意忍受,那就沒有什么壞處。但你大部分的注意力都會被它吸引。一旦它被移除,它可能吸引力額外的注意力,但過了一段時間它就不再重要了。


There's a philosophy of the Settler and the Seeker. (and I'm not referring to the one quoted by Marshall in HIMYM since I haven't watched the TV series yet)
Let me elaborate.
Relationships mostly do not involve equal foothold of both the partners. More often, one person out of them is the one who first "seeks" or "finds" the other. Let us say, that person is the man. He is the one who first notices the woman, begins to like her, and tries to pursue her affection. He is the seeker, who yearns for her more than she yearns for him. Even though he may be completely in love with her, yet he knows that she isn't perfect. But he seeks Perfection. He seeks beauty, he seeks kindness, mystery, intelligence. He knows that eventually he is going to win in his pursuit of finding the perfect woman, even though that perfect woman may not be his current lover. He will never cease to seek the Perfect one. And when he finds a woman even slightly close to what he wants, he loves her and begins a relationship.

這里有一種追求者和被追求者的哲學。(我指的不是馬修在《老爸老媽的浪漫史》中引用的那個,因為我還沒看過那部電視?。?br /> 我詳細說明一下。
戀愛關系大多不涉及雙方的平等立足點。更多的時候,他們中的一個人首先“追求”或“尋找”另一個人。比如,那個人是男人。他是最先注意到女人,開始喜歡她,并試圖追求她。他是一個追求者,他對她的渴望超出了她對他的渴望。盡管他可能完全愛上了她,但他知道她并不完美。但他追求完美。他追求美麗,他追求善良、神秘、智慧。他知道最終他會在尋找完美女人的過程中獲勝,盡管那個完美的女人可能不是他現在的愛人。他永遠不會停止追求完美。當他發現一個女人和他想要的稍微接近時,他就會愛上她并開始一段感情。

Then, there's the settler. The woman who initially didn't notice the man who was paying attention and affection to her with his distant eyes. She always dreamt of someone probably different, if not better than him, as her romantic partner. However, inspite of her not being "attracted" to him initially, she begins a friendship with him. She likes him for his goodness, politeness and the way he loves her. Here, she settles for someone who isn't as good as she had maybe dreamed of. She is tries to "repay" his "generosity of love" by loving him back.
So, what happens when love turns sour? The seeker is sorrowful and takes a few days to overcome his grief. But then he begins his life afresh and it really is not a Herculean task for him to forget the bad times. However, the settler is more than just "sorrowful". She is broken because even though she loved him with all her heart and soul, things didn't work out. She had finally found someone whom she was compatible with, someone who complemented her and brought out the best in her. But, this lack of "chemistry" as some would say and their difference of opinions and mindsets drifted them apart.
So, who finally is more affected by the breakup? The one who had settled for the other.

然后是被追求者。這個女人一開始并沒有注意到那個男人用他遙遠的目光關注和愛慕著她。她總是夢求一個可能不同甚至沒有他好的人做她的浪漫伴侶。然而,盡管她最初沒有被他“吸引”,但她開始和他開始建立了友誼。她喜歡他是因為他的善良、禮貌和他愛她的方式。在這里,她選擇了一個不如她想象中那么好的人。她試圖通過愛他來“報答”他的“慷慨的愛”。
那么,當愛情變質時會發生什么呢?追求者很悲傷,并需要幾天時間來克服悲傷。但是隨后他重新開始了自己的生活,對于他來說,忘記那些不好的日子確實不是一項艱巨的任務。然而,被追求者不僅僅是“悲傷”。她心碎了,因為盡管她全心全意地愛著他,但一切都沒有意義。她終于找到了一個與她相配的人,一個能與她互補,并把她最好的一面展現出來的人。但是,正如某些人會說的那樣, “化學反應”的缺乏,以及他們在觀點和思維方式上的差異,使他們分道揚鑣。
那么,誰最終更受分手的影響呢?答案是那個為另一方安頓下來的人。
5、Desh Kumar Rath, former Risk Analyst at Amazon India (2016-2019) 前亞馬遜印度風險分析師(2016-2019)

Both are affected equally, but it depends on how much they allow themselves to suffer.
Imagine you are addicted to alcohol, and love a very specific brand of it . And then suddenly one day you cease to get access to the brand. What would one do?
The lover will spend his/her days in grief trying to overcome the addiction. He/She will miss and cherish the taste/ the high it gave. The person ( male/female) might even be apprehensive to get into a new brand’s addiction in fear of the same happening again. The person might get angry on the brand for shutting down abruptly or he can be understanding about the issue and stay at peace. Or the person to overcome the pain might just try a new brand in search of the same happiness he used to derive from the previous brand. It can also happen that the lover accidentally comes across a new brand and falls in love with it.

兩者都受到同樣的影響,但這取決于他們允許自己承受多大的痛苦。
想象一下您沉迷于酒精,并且愛上了一個非常特別的牌子。然后突然有一天你不再接觸這個品牌了。你會怎么做?
愛好者會在悲傷中度過他或她的日子,試圖克服對其的沉迷。他或她會懷念和珍惜它給人的那種滋味或興奮感。這個人(男人或女人)甚至可能會因為害怕接觸新品牌,以免再次上癮。這個人可能會因為品牌突然倒閉而生氣,或者他可以理解這個問題并保持平靜?;蛘?,克服痛苦的人可能會嘗試一個新的品牌,以尋求與以前品牌相同的快樂。也有可能是愛好者偶然遇到一個新品牌,愛上了它。

The same goes with humans. Love is like an one on one addiction. When it breaks, it hurts for sure. It affects both the involved entities. Its supposed to affect, how can it not? But the way different people react to it and the amount of time they suffer, that is different. In majority of cases the heartbreak brings grief and suffering, followed by anger/ revenge and or lastly moving on/ peace with it.
My ex moved on within weeks of moving to a new city after breaking up, even though it looked as if she was the one to get affected exponentially during/after break up. I wasn’t much affected then but even today after two years, she still crawls into my thoughts and I loose hours of sleep thinking about what and how it happened. So who do you think got affected more?

人類也是如此。愛情就像一個人對更一個人成癮。當它破裂時,肯定會影響到兩個相關實體。它應該影響,怎么會不影響呢?但不同的人對此的反應方式和他們所遭受的痛苦時間長短是不同的。在大多數情況下,心碎會帶來悲傷和痛苦,隨之而來的是憤怒或報復,最后或許是繼續或坦然面對。
我的前任在分手后搬到了一個新的城市,幾周后就搬走了,盡管看起來她是那個在分手期間或之后受到成倍影響的人。我當時并沒有受到太大的影響,但即使是兩年后的今天,她仍然會進入我的腦海,我也會在睡覺時放松下來,思考發生了什么事以及是如何發生的。你認為誰受到的影響更大?

Now there are different facets to it. Who was more involved? Why did the partner chose to break away? When exactly did red flags start popping up? All these will indicate who was more affected and why was the other less.
I would end with an interesting statistic.
With the present social scenario and the skewed sex ratio we have everywhere, for every single/just broken up girl there are 4 to 5 men willing to approach her. And not the other way round. 4 to 5 men! At least one is meant to stay forever!!

它有不同的方面。誰更深陷其中?為什么對方選擇分手?什么時候開始出現危險信號的?所有這些都將表明誰受到的影響更大,而另一個受到的影響則較小。
我將以一組有趣的統計數字作為結尾。
在目前的社會形勢下,到處都存在性別比例失調,對于每一個單身或剛分手的女孩來說,都有4至5個男人愿意接近她。而不是相反。4至5個人!至少有一個會永遠留下來!